I use Twitter. A lot. There’s a service called Klout that analyzes your tweets and tells you how influential you are. I tried it. It’s like having your palm read. It means nothing, and doesn’t tell you anything about yourself you didn’t already know. Except motorcycles. 

Klout tells me I’m most influential about motorcycles. I’ve never owned a motorcycle in my life and rarely if ever have I tweeted about them. In fact I can’t recall if I ever tweeted about them, but I’ve made more than 28,000 tweets, so I wouldn’t be surprised if I tweeted about them once or twice.

What started this off was someone had also tweeted about something bizarre Klout did, so I replied with my story. Well as is often the case someone else jumped into the conversation. I did not care. I still don’t care. They said I should read their methodology. I told them I don’t care. They never offered an explanation why Klout thinks I’m influential about motorcycles. I have no horse in this race. And this dude or dudette keeps replying about Klout that I have no interest in. I’m trying to convey that I’m annoyed but it’s not getting through. Anger is usually the easiest thing to infer or misinfer on the Internet even when it’s not there, but the dude just isn’t getting it.

The entire purpose of Klout is to prey on your vanity and somehow monetize it. I’ll use the Underpants Gnome analogy.
1. Prey on tweeter’s vanity.
2. ???
3. Profit.